Friday, July 10, 2009

A Little This 'n That

Another catch-all blog post, because I'm bored and easily distracted.

  • Is it just me, or does Alexandre Dumas get more boring with each book? The Three Musketeers was fun, The Count of Monte Christo was excellent, Twenty Years After was good enough but took me for-fucking-ever to read, and The Vicomte of Bragelonne is damnably hard to get into. If I make it all the way to (and through) The Man in the Iron Mask, I think I'll deserve a huge fucking pat on the back. All things considered, though, he's it's not as bad as Hugo and The Hunchback of Notre Dame. I've never wanted to stab a book so badly in my entire life...
  • I tried the Bacon Cheesy Potato Burrito from Taco Bell today, because I saw a commercial for it last weekend and declared "I must have that!" Verdict: they put sour cream on it, which is what I blame on the... unpleasantness in the bathroom that ensued; normally, all my taco-related products are without sour cream and I never have such difficulties. Otherwise, it was bacony.
  • My boyfriend's mother asked me if I wanted to go clothes shopping with her last weekend, because my birthday is coming up. I felt bad saying no, but clothes shopping is fucking painful for me. Socks don't fit, because my feet are too small - the heels invariably end up above my ankles. Pants don't fit, because my legs are too short. Even petite sizes are too long. Bras and shirts definitely don't fit, because my tits are bigger than my head. The only thing I can safely buy is skirts (which I never wear) and underwear. Body fail!
  • Whenever Kevin Smith tweets about the amazing sex he has with his wife, and Wil Wheaton tweets about the amazing geeky things his wife says, itgives me hope for the American marriage, which seems to think is on the brink of fail. But what do I know about the American marriage? I was divorced at the age of 21. Actually, I probably know more about the American marriage than most.
  • I may be growing addicted to websites like Texts From Last Night and Not Always Right. Each site makes me both glad and regretful that my life isn't more interesting. But it's seriously addicting to just read through the archives.
  • I have a doctor's appointment next week; I finally get to talk to someone about the headaches I get every day! I'll be very disappointed if the doc suggests I see a chiropractor. It's hard to take the profession seriously when a chiro gave your ex-husband a stroke through a botched adjustment. Also, I wonder what expression the doc will have when he or she gives me my breast exam; I strongly suspect the dressing gown will surprisingly downplay how big they actually are, and am hoping for a look of shocked horror. Morbid? Me?
To wrap things up, here are some photos from last weekend, when we went home to SD to visit friends and fam.

World's Largest Pheasant, standing proud and tall in Huron, SD. Outstanding...

We bought fireworks here. Apparently that's a ride that hasn't worked in 30 years or more. If you look closely (or embiggen the photo by clicking on it) you can see a blue swastika painted on the side of one of the cars.

Fireworks and beer ALWAYS go together!
We dropped a smoke bomb in a puddle.



  1. The Three Musketeers is excellent, but my favorite by Dumas is definitely The Count of Monte Cristo. I never made it even halfway through Man in the Iron Mask, so if you've got further, go ahead and pat yourself on the back now.

    Love the Kevin Smith and Wil Wheaton "marriage" related posts. There are times when I feel like my wife and I are the only ones we know that are happily married, so it's a good feeling to know we aren't isolated. We're both geeks too - do you think that helps?

    I used to follow your Flickr stream and enjoyed your photography there. That giant pheasant is awesome-sauce; I've always loved little oddities like that, and wonder about the person who made them.

  2. The Man in the Iron Mask is actually the last book in the Three Musketeers "series", and/or the last volume of the Vicomte of Bragelonne novel, which has three volumes in all (and I am trying to work my way through the first). Also, I just realized I've probably been spelling Vicomte wrong this whole time. The Wiki:

    Honestly, I've really enjoyed what Steven Brust did with the Dumas style in his Khaavren romances a lot more than the books he based them on. If you've not read them, I highly recommend beginning with The Phoenix Guards.

    I was married to a geek; it does not have any inherent benefits.

  3. Please, don't be fooled by doctors. There is nothing wrong with large breasts and there are other more promising and natural ways to get rid of headaches or back pain, e.g. cardiovascular exercise, strength/muscle training and improved nutrition. You will regret a breast reduction the major part of your life. It hurts my heart to read that you are/were considering this. Please don't do it.

  4. Hey Mr Anonymous, what evidence can you offer to your hypothesis that I will regret my decision to cut my tits off in six weeks, to counter my own hypothesis that you're a selfish asshole that has no idea who I am or what I'm going through?

    I've never heard a single remark from a woman who's gotten breast reduction surgery to even remotely suggest that she has ever regretted it, and I've been doing my research. Rather, all comments seem to be filled with joy and happiness about their new, freer life.

    Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence, Mr. Anonymous.

  5. My claims are not extraordinary.
    You have to bear in mind that breast reduction surgery is permanent, that means not ever reversible. People change over time, so do their attitudes, wished and needs and so do you. Because most reports are done in some short timeframe after surgery, the majority of reports neglect this fact. To admit to regret the surgery (years later) is also very related to self-esteem and being ashamed, hence less common to be reported later on. Five to ten years from now the whole situation could be different to you.
    Besides there are tons of reports on the internet from women that regret that they had the surgery. If you 'never heard a single remark' about regrets, your research methods are probably extremely flawed.
    As I described there are way more promising, reversible, more beneficial and less invasive methods of addressing your physical health issues. For example losing overall weight (therefore also breast size), doing regular exercise, back exercises and cardiovascular exercises (yes, most people are simply to damn lazy for that) and improving nutrition (which relates to a diet which also involves some effort). In contrast to breast reduction surgery, those things are almost certain to remove your physical health problems.
    I can't really state much about psychological issues, but suffice it to say that there are quite a few other very beautiful women with normal breast size in this world who do not get the fancy idea of mutilating their bodies because they recognise that there is something extraordinary about their appearance.
    Nowadays the common belief is that you can fix anything by eating a pill, having some surgery or pushing a button. But in most cases there are better and more preferable alternatives.

    Here are some resources of information:
    "Overall, I don't regret having it done, but I do regret having it done so young. I'm not sure I was able to make an informed decision about it at the time I had it done. I do regret that I will (probably) never be able to breastfeed."
    [.. google for more]$File/Breast_reduction_for_women.pdf

    ~ by some selfish asshole who does not know you and has absolutely no personal benefit by caring about your health

  6. I just recognised that I accidentally posted the last two links which are nonsense that came up while searching on the internet. Disregard those links.